Hold on
There’s something that has always scared me as a therapist that I’ve learned to get comfortable with over the years.
Suicidal thoughts and ideation.
If you didn’t know, it’s a therapist’s nightmare to have a client actually commit suicide. People think perhaps because it’s a liability, but really it’s because that’s a tough loss to cope with. I have lost numerous clients over the years, never to suicide, but it is a loss that is hard to describe. I think death is something we know is going to happen to all of us but never really think about what it will feel like when it does.
I recently read about Frances Bean Cobain, daughter of the late Kurt Cobain, who died by suicide decades ago. He was the lead singer of Nirvana and never really seemed to get comfortable for the huge fame that he got for being so talented. His daughter was very little when he died and grew up in the shadow of the suicide of her father. She struggled with feeling suicidal for years, that is until she was on a plane that had one wing catch fire. She recognized the possibility of her death and she vowed to practice radical gratitude that she was alive. Why does it take such a dramatic event for this to take place?
In my years of working in community mental health, I learned to do safety plans with my clients. Most of them were suicidal. Quite frankly, dealing with the amount of stress and difficulty on a daily basis would have challenged anyone. We would make a plan and often they would come in and tell me about times they were close to taking action on the suicidal thoughts but pivoted after they slept or after they called a friend, or any of the other things on their safety plan. The pain of that moment didn’t last forever. They had to hold on to see if tomorrow would feel different. I am in no way diminishing the depression that typically comes with feeling suicidal. It is hard to imagine that things will ever get better. I get it.
As a therapist that uses psychedelics, namely Ketamine in my practice, I see many people that have tried everything. People typically end up contemplating Ketamine when nothing else has worked. I am surprised that it can’t be the first approach. I gained insights I never would have about different things while using Ketamine. I’ve seen people make much faster progress when using Ketamine. Something that would never be resolved in therapy is resolved in just one session. I firmly believe in it because I know it works. It shuts off the part of your ego that gets in the way of making any progress in therapy. Ketamine is very helpful with people who are contemplating suicide. It is helpful for people that need to try something different.
Why does it take us to go to the edge to be open to a new approach? What if we could take approaches when they are available to help us?
If you aren’t sure about Ketamine, I encourage you to do some research. It is extremely effective, even with people who have tried EVERYTHING else. I also don’t believe that you have to try everything else before you get to Ketamine. It can be your first approach, especially if you have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). Why suffer for months or even years if you can get some relief faster?
I encourage you to do your research. Ketamine has been studied and used since the 1960s. It’s been FDA approved since the 70s, only now has it been approved for use in mental health practices. It is important that you pair it with psychotherapy because what you learn from your journey with Ketamine has to be integrated. If you’re interested, please check my services page or reach out to me for more information.
